WOLF IN LOVE

 What Is It That I Love?

If asked why I love her I would say
It’s the sway in her hips,
the thickness in her thighs.
It’s the lust in her lips,
the love in her eyes.
It’s the softness of her skin,
the silk in her hair.
It’s the twist in her walk;
it’s the sweetness in her talk.
It’s the way she loves me
that makes me love her each day.
That is what I would say.

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July, 24th - 2005

This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, and love

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 I love your lips when they're wet with wine
And red with a wild desire;
I love your eyes when the love light lies
Lit with a passionate fire.
I love your arms when the warm white flesh
Touches mine in a fond embrace;
I love your hair when the strands enmesh
Your kisses against my face

 Ahhhh... So good to kiss.

I love to kiss and to be kissed....   wet tongues meeting......  dancing a wet dance...... mmmmmm

 Games in bed. 

Spend a whole night playing....

 And sleep together.  mmmm   So good to sleep together.

What a sensation to wake up... and feel your lvoe is there, by your side, in the reach of hands...  A long time I havent felt this sensation.   And a great value I give now for this.

So strange that we spend a life time thinking some situations are normal.  But.... we are caught living a fantasy...  this is true.

A fantasy we create.

And, no longer......

 

  Sex!

YEs!! sex!!!

 sex

sex

sex

sex

on my mind

on my hands

on my whole body

when i catch u, i will eat u up as u have never been eaten

will make u cum so many times that u will think ur going to die

will take u to heaven in deep orgasms.

 

 While I was sorting out the things to put away i got to find some old pics, lol
I will upload them in here,lol

This is Adriana and I !!!  I was about 16 years old, and she was 18 !!  Look !! Hahaha
I hope she doesnt get annoyed that I uploaded her pic in here,lol

This is me...  Baby Crissy.  I think I was 4 years old, or 3.  I had a ball and a sandwich in my hands,lol

This is me and my brother, during a carnival party in our club.  My brother dressed as Robin, lol  How ridiculous,lol But he was a cute child :) I was throwing bits of paper in his head to annoy him.

this is me, wearing a Chips helmet, hahahaha  Me and my brother, in our first bikes! lol  Gosh, how could I be wearing such a thing in my head??  Look how I was tall since I was young! I think I was about 10 years old in this pic, and my brother 6.

This is mum and I, before my brother was born, so I was 3 years old in this pic, probably.  She had taken me to the zoo.

This is me, mum and brother in the sand hills. Think i was 7 years old. This is in a beach in Rio de Janeiro State, called Cabo Frio. Dad and Mom loved to go there and we spent many vacation seasons in there.  In that time we didnt have an apartment on the beach (dad bought one when I was about 13 years old) so we spent the vacations in Hotels, always, on the beach.

This is me, in another sand hills area in the isle of Florianópolis, SC I was 26 years old.  I miss that body shape,lol  Gosh, I love sand hills!!

This is one of my babies!! Janis Joplin when she was only 5 months old!!  In my mums couch,lol

And this is a pic of Vils and Baby Artur!!!  He is sooooooooooooo cute!!!!!!!!!!!

I miss seeing Artur in the web cam!!  I last saw him when he was 1 month old!! now, he is 4 months old! Gosh, this baby is so cute!!! I wanted to pinch his cheeks!! I decided to upload Artur baby pic in here cos i am afraid i may lose it if my computer gets a virus or something and i lack of R-Cd s to record it. - another thing I must buy this week to make a back up of my pics in the computer!

I rememebr when Vils put baby Artur for me to see he could not stop moving and it took a while until I could make a good shot of him,lol  Vils started to get irritated cos the baby was putting his hands in the keyboard and mouse and many times he lost connection, hahaha and the baby pee in his lap and all that stuff babies are supposed to make, lol 

I love you, Artur!!!!!!!!!!

THE HISTORY OF ARAB PEOPLES

 Good morning world!  - although it is 13:52

This is the book me and Chris are reading!  He is reading in english - obvious, and I am reading in portuguese - cos I am lazy,lol  - seriously: If it took 5 working days until the book got to me, imagine if i had asked a version in english?  Also, in my own language it is much easier to read, as it goes about a theme I am completely a dummy, and i dont want to get worried about new vocabulary and stuff.  Just trying to understand the story itself is already a pain, imagine if i had to read with a dictionary nearby?

The idea of sharing the book with Chris was very pertinent because it is boring to read a book on our own.  Better if we have someone to share ideas and discuss the bits we think are confusing or complicated.  So, my darling is reading the book too and I am glad I will have someone to ask questions

Why choosing such a deep book?  Because I feel I need more information on the topic.  Any talk we join nowadays, we find people discussing about the middle east and its problems and its culture, and stuff.  I consider myself a complete dumb in this matter as i havent studied it at school and also i never got interested in that region.  So, I caught myself silent as a piece of stone when ppl start to talk about it.  And something that I hate is to be put aside a conversation because I dont know anything about the topic, lol    Of course that I dont want to be an expertise, but i think that a little knowledge is better than NO knowledge.  :)

At least i have already read the prologue and last night I read some of the 1st chapter and I have already discovered something i really didnt know! I didnt know that the maome islam was created only from V Century!!  I dunno why, i thought that muslims were older than Christians.  Gosh.  To me, that was a surprise. 

Also, i am surprised by the number of diferent religions, a variation of Christian religion in that area.  Jews and Christians living in the same piece of land.  And also another thing that surprised me was about Zoroastro.  (those names I have no idea of how they are spelled in english)  I could never think that Zoroastro philosophy had to do with middle east. To me, it was greek.  Gosh, so many things to learn!!!

Also, finally i got to know what aramaic language was!  The language that preceeded the current Arabic !!  Funny that there is that place called Anatolia, on the south of Black Sea.  That is funny, as Anatolia ressembles the russian name Anatoli.  A name for boys in Russia. Do you think there are links between this name Anatolia for that region and the russian name Anatoli?  I will ask my russian friends about it, now I am curious. Black sea is makes border with Russia and it is considered a sort of resort area for them Russians in their "summer". As my friend told me , he went to Crimnea to spend his summer vacations, on the coast of Black Sea.  But..... the name Anatolia and Anatoli really surprised me!! 

I will try to find out the co-relation between the names and soon i will post in here.

Well, besides this new hobby i found for both Chris and I  - I do hope he likes the book. As he told me he likes geography and adventury, well, I think that the history of arab peoples have plenty of these 2 elements, lol -  I decided to get rid of my plastic folders here at my bedroom.

I decided to buy a folder with divisions inside and labels in each part, and so, yesterday, when i came home from school, I put all my plastic enormous folders on the floor and separated all that i wanted to keep and the things I should put away. 

These are the old plastic folders i had some of my stuff kept:

So, imagine all the stuff i used to keep there....  and I could put all that I wanted to keep in one single folder, with divisions:

I got all the names such as:  "light bill", "bills to be paid", "condominion tax", "govern taxes", "health insurance", "personal docs", "bank receipts" etc etc...  

The difference was enormous!!!  Im amazed!!  I could put away 11 folders which were in my book shelf and replace them all for a single one !!!

Look the difference!!  This part with books were all having those ugly plastic folders!! Now i even got more room left to put my teddy bears!!! lol

I could take my CD case and my floppy disk case from under my desk and put them in the book shelf!! Finally!! I cant believe it how a stupid and simple idea of buying a single folder with divisions could make my life easier and more organized!!!

ok, I spent from 14hs up to 6pm sorting out all the papers ,  then i crashed on bed.  But it worthed all the time spent in doing that!  I dont have any more all those bits of paper spread out in my apartment!!!  Im proud of myself!! lol

Now just 2 more things to sort out:

1) all the mess I have in the 2 big drawers bellow my bed and
2) 4 drawers I have in the kitchen with papres that goes from "Kitchen recipe books" to "manual of all equipment i have bought so far"". 

But these 2 remaining things I will leave for another occasion, when I have the time and mood to sort them out.

 

 

 

 

The week with the wolf.

 Many things happening in this past week.

First subject, of course couldnt be nothing less except the revolting results for the american presidential elections.
Now that Bush has won with the majority of votes, totalizing more than 50% of USA votes, he has more power than ever. 
Earlier, there were ppl who claimed him as illegaly chosen as they had to go to the Supreme Court in order to validate his election.  Now. There is no more doubt.

Now, The Emperor is back, and even stronger.  As it is his final term, and he will never more be elected as a president anymore, Now he can do ANYTHING he wishes.

I was reading some stuff in the White House site the other day and I found his speech there, and gosh, they are turning America into an evangelic centre.  So, we live today 2 extreme powers:  The Islam, with their oil  and Evangelic, with the economic power and the most well equipped army force.  

In one side: a country whose ppl believe that they are there to save the world, as a Gods tool, with extreme dangerous weapons, the world economy in their hands and not respect towards the UN.

In the other side:  a region whose ppl believe they are there to save the world, as Allah's tool, with extreme dedicated suicide people, like the dangerous kamikases, not an excelence in army force, but with blood links and faith that can replace any intelligent bomb.

Two side of the same view:  maniac ppl, intolerant, cruel and ready to make the world a worst place to live.

There will come the day when both nations blow up and vanish in the air.  Indeed, that would turn the planet a more healthier place.  

 
 

I decided to read more on the History of Arab People and Chris agreed to read aswell, so we can both learn more and be able to discuss things cos i really have the urge to study more on this theme, not that i love the topic, in fact, i have never had any sort of interest on it, but the happenings throughout the world and the latest tragedies, force me to read more about it so that i can understand why is there such a big confusion that will never end in that piece of land?

We both ordered the book last night and they are supposed to be delivered this coming week. :) 

THIS IS NOT A PIPE

THIS IS NOT A HAPPY PEOPLE

 

THIS IS NOT A LEADER OF HIS NATION

THIS IS NOT A HUMAN BEING

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 My diet:  Of course i havent taken the medicines over the weekend, as I cant drink alcohol while i am under the effects of the medicine, so, i took my last pill on friday and will continue from Monday on. 

As the firts day i got a terible headache, i was a bit afraid of the side effects in the second day, but fortunately i didnt feel anything, just the delicious feeling of "hunger-free" during the whole day.  So, i just had lunch and that was all i had during the week.

I havent notived that i lost some weigh yet.  This is something that worries me.  Cos if i dont start to lose weight from this week on, i will go on more drastic diet control. 

Lets see what happens.

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Clocks went forward one hour. Nice to have the daylight until 7pm ! And weird too. Cos i got the sensation that I work more.  Dunno.

I dont think it is right to change ppls habits and make them adapt to a new routine. All for the sake of the saving.

Weird to see the 7pm group coming to classes and it is still daylight.

Anyway, this is what i wanted to say for now.  I will upload more things as I find them out in the net.

Gosh, I have 2 magazines to read for tomorrow.  I feel lazy.

Ah! By the way, Yasir Arafat is still in the hospital. Can u believe that Sharon, the israeli murder doesnt want him to be buried in Jerusalem?  Its going a terrible discussion between Sharon and the Palestins.  That man sucks.

Wednesday!!!   Feels like Monday!

 Hey Hey !!  Wednesday is here! back top work again! 4 days of pure relaxation, and feet up and all that stuff we like doing when we are not working: watching Tv til late, eating a lot, drinking beer, chatting in the net, going to the streets and seeing the city empty, laughing  at ppl who went to the beach and had a strong rain in there, lol

Not that I am a bad person but it really satisfyes me when I see all that crowd driving their cars to the beach and then a huge rain fall over their heads and they have to be locked at their beach houses or flats playing cards, hahahaha

At least, being the city gives you more options for entertainment. Even tho it rains cats and dogs. Well. anyway.  Lets go for a balance, a summary of my so different and exciting activities during this 4 day break.lol

I slept a lot. Oh yes.  Slept until i got fed up of being in bed. 

I ate a lot cos on tuesday I was supposed to start my diet, so I ate like a pig during the previous days. From cakes to pies. from A to Z. 

I also talked to some ppl on the phone even tho I didnt want.  I think that I developed a deep hate towards telephone.  When it rings I simply shiver. I just hate when ppl call me.  I am the one who wants to decide whether I am willing to talk to them and when.  This is crazy I know.  But I dont like to answer telephones nor talkin on them.

Some ppl have the urge to talk to ppl. But when I mean talk, i am talking about really talk, oral.  As I do this at work, for 8, 9, 10 hours a day, I think that when I am at home, I just want to have some peace.  In fact, i dont have anything to talk to ppl.

If someone calls me and asks me: <>  what do I say? Nothing much. Do u really think ppl are interested in ur life? Bullshit. All they want is to have an excuse to talk about their own lives. So, when u reply: nothing much. and u? Then they are happy. and start to talk non stop.

What sort of news do I have apart from my job and family?  Gosh!  I am not going to preach about job to others, especially if they dont belong to my field of work, also, family matters are not what interest others the most.  So??  Why would I carry out a conversation on the phone?  Phone is just a tool to leave messages. And quick ones.
Like: "What time are u coming?" - ok. i meet u at 10. "......"Cris, dont forget today it is ur cousins birthday." ok. thats it.

And also, the telephone always rings when i cant answer. Either ur in the shower, or watching soapopera.  I hate when ppl call me in the middle of a soap. Grrr

But the worst thing is when ppl call you to complain that you never call them.  And then, u have to give excuses, say uve been working too much, or that ur telephone is facing problems in the line or whatever.  Sometimes people cant understand that even tho u havent call them, it doesnt mean that u dont love them.

Well, then I started taking the medicines to help me in my diet.

Finally the medicine arrived through mail parcel (lol) and I started taking them.
I spent the whole Tuesday with just a serving of broccolis in my stomach. By 7pm i had a very strong headache.
But I think that that was due to the lack of food in my belly.  As it is used to be plenty full 24 hours a day, haha.
I went to bed with that strong headache and took some pain killers .  Gosh, I had a real cocktail of medicines.!!

Today I plan to take the medicine at 11:30, so that I dont feel hungry at midday and can spend a whole afternoon w/o eating.  For the breakfast, I was starving and went to the bakery and bought 2 croissant with ham and cheese.  So, that will be my food for today.  I have some veggies in the fridge, but I will just prepare them by the night.

My aim: to fit in the jeans I used to wear 2 years ago, before I turned to be a couch potatoe.

Exercise?  well.  If I had enough money I would enroll in the gym just across from my building.

 

 

Also, the São Paulo election.  I voted for MArta and so did most of my friends, except for Cristina, of course.

By the way, she is behaving like a real crap character.  She is always in a bad mood and being rude, especially to me.  She is always discontented about her life, about her work, about anything u dare to mention.  If u tell her something like: "Look, Cris, have u seen that program on TV?" She says: "I dont watch TV." Then, of course, u just stay there, with that puzzled face.  And ur intention of a subject breaks.  Then u say: "Oh, have u talked to Adri recently?" She says: " I havent talked to her, cos I dont have time to talk to no one." Gosh! So......excuse me....... "GO to Hell!!!"

Then, she comes and she complains about being alone and etc. That it is hard to find a bf and stuff. That all men are crap, and she hates them all, and she doesnt have patience to start a brand new relationship.  Well.  I think that she is too bad tempered, and not she scaries men away, but also her friends.

She is always making fantasies about leaving the country and dating a man from germany or Norway. Gosh What a taste! lol 

I think that she tripps too much in her mind and she demands too much from men. He must be beautiful, intelligent, smart, good tempered, vegetarian, artistical, a good drawer, etc etc.  I think she will NEVER find any one that meets her requirements,lol

And...more over:  A bunch of white-pale german guys that eats shukruts and dances that ridiculous dance with ridiculous shorts are not very attractive, dont u think?? lol  Also, Norweggians:  guys who live in an ice berg and talk that miserable language. Gosh, those guys must be so white that u can even see their veins through their skin.

Ok, English are also white, but well...  I dunno. Ok, the white thing doesnt enter the discussion then.
But well. a good sun tanning is fine and sensual.  Not those red - shrimp like tan. I mean a real brownish tan. Sweat bodies, sun tanned. Shapped bellies and stuff. hehehe

But well. Ok, Im happy with my Chris whiteness, lol
One day he comes to brazil and I can get rid of his paleness and so, He can get a little sun tan. :)

I think that if he comes to brazil he will never return to England,lol  Gosh, cant wait to see his face when I take him to a barbecue session! lol  Also, those fruits that he has never seen or eaten, and the warmth of the sun here in the tropics. From what I have heard from English ppl in here, when they first the sun from here, they said it was an unforgetable experience. Not that it hurt, but the sensation of warmth.

And also, the brightness of the sun.  They say that in England the sun is not so bright, due to the geographical position. Adri also tells me that. Weird , isnt it?

Well. Im really looking forward to have him in here for some days and i hope that he is brave enough to cross the atlantic and adventure himself in the tropics!! hahaah  That would be , certainly the best trip of his life!  He doesnt know what he is missing!
He doesnt know what a beach is. Those beaches there are really strange. They are not beautiful. They are just a bunch of rocks, hard sand, and cold water. Even tho i find they are beautiful as they are different, but I cant consider those as being beaches.  They look more as lagoons.

I dont think he knows what it feels like being on a beach for the whole day, feeling the warm breeze, feeling the warm water, being served bt waiters on the beach, drinking chilled beer, feeling the soft sand. and the smell of the ocean. ahhhh  so good!  But being careful with his skin, of course. wearing a t-shirt and cap. and not leaving the sun umbrella. hehe

Anyway.

Time to get dressed and head to work. They are still counting votes in US. lol 
Hope that they manage to end it by tonight.  And whoever wins, the Imperialism will countinue.

Bye for now.
Ah! ohhhhhhh  I want to go to the beach!!!! With Chris:)

The higher mental development of woman, the less possible it is for her to meet a congenial male who will see in her, not only sex, but also the human being, the friend, the comrade and strong individuality, who cannot and ought not lose a single trait of her character.

Emma Goldman

Hey lady, you lady, cursing at your life
You're a discontented mother and a regimented wife
I've no doubt you dream about the things you'll never do
But, I wish someone had talked to me
Like I wanna talk to you.....

Oh, I've been to Georgia and California and anywhere I could run
I took the hand of a preacher man and we made love in the sun
But I ran out of places and friendly faces because I had to be free
I've been to paradise but I've never been to me

Please lady, please lady, don't just walk away
'Cause I have this need to tell you why I'm all alone today
I can see so much of me still living in your eyes
Won't you share a part of a weary heart that has lived million lies....

Oh, I've been to Niece and the Isle of Greece while I've sipped champagne on a yacht
I've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo and showed 'em what I've got
I've been undressed by kings and I've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to see
I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me

[spoken]
Hey, you know what paradise is?
It's a lie, a fantasy we create about people and places as we'd like them to be
But you know what truth is?
It's that little baby you're holding, it's that man you fought with this morning
The same one you're going to make love with tonight
That's truth, that's love......

Sometimes I've been to crying for unborn children that might have made me complete
But I took the sweet life, I never knew I'd be bitter from the sweet
I've spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that costs too much to be free
Hey lady......
I've been to paradise, (I've been to paradise)
But I've never been to me

 

René Magritte.
Painter - Surrealism
Belgian

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Just take a look at this painting.
What do you imagine?

Why are they both kissing but with their heads covered by a bed sheet/ cloth?

Why do they want to hide their faces?

Do you think that people usually behave this way?

Do you, yourself behave this way?

Why is that so difficult to take away "cloths" from ourselves?

Do those "cloths" protect or hide?

What is there under the cloth?

A quote from Leon Trotsky that I do like and has to do with the theme:

"The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves. People reveal themselves completely only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life, for only then do they have to fall back on their reserves."

---

René Magritte

This is a very interesting painting aswell. 
Disturbing.

A man lifting weight.  And one of the weight is his own head.

I believe that the heaviest weight we lift and carry along our lives is our own mind.

Our minds are very powerful...  And dangerous.

They are responsible for what we are.  And this is tough.

Do you examine your mind often?

Do you consider making questions to yourself just to let yourself know about your real you?